1. |
Doze - Sinking
03:22
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I’ll take the long way home
Until it takes my soul
I know you mean well
Reach out to me
There’s a businessman
Who wants my soul
With outstretched hands
Around my throat
He wanders toward my home
He wanders toward my family
Yeah, there’s a business man
Who wants my soul
With outstretched hands
Around my throat
I’ll take the long way home
Until it takes my soul
With outstretched hands
Around my throat
I wander toward my home
I wander toward an Iridescent glow
I wondered why you woke
From Intermittent doze
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2. |
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An ivory star pinned to her heart
will live on long after the grass
around the thistle wilts,
It blends endlessly
Every scar pinned to her heart
Will live long after
the thistle blossoms
One day reality centers I’m told
Die as I wander alone in a storm
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3. |
Horace - Sinking
02:14
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I’d like to meet the man
Who mumbles slightly
I’d like to meet the man
Who stumbles blindly into God
Is his mind any more fragile
Than my neighbor, Horace
Sweet like swine
Bend and groan
Taking up your precious time
So we may
laugh until we sleep
And we blame Horace
My neighbor, bloated
Sweet like swine
Bent and grown
Taking up our precious time
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4. |
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"oh, no," i said
i think about the times
the way you smile at me
and how we always kiss
and how we drank the sun
and killed the night
and fought the sleep and won
and how we left it all unmade
it was only once
now there's more than one
no, there's only one
now there's more than one
you're the only one
you're the only one
you're the only one
it's good to see
that you are doing well
and well enough to be
laughing here with me
'cause what we did
there's no excuse for it
you know i love you so
and it hurts to know what i did
it was only once
i want you to know
that i will always love you
and always be your friend
and never leave you again
the past is past us now
so we can go
and we can move ahead
i hope this letter gets read
if just only once
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5. |
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They say rejection just protects you from what could have been
Well If that’s true, when will these bruises fade?
I guess somehow I’m never enough for anyone,
To reciprocate the words I have to say
Well I tried so hard to be myself,
But anxiety takes over
And I think I’m fucking over this feeling
Every time it’s just the same
Somehow ending where it started
From more than friends to strangers once again
And as the weeks pass
I feel my insides contorting,
With each and every breath I struggle to take
Just like the letter
I crumpled up
and threw right in the floor,
Tried to flatten all the edges,
But that just won’t make a difference anymore
I get emotional just opening my mouth
What a fool I was to think this would have a happy ending
Saying nothing feels simple until pressure builds starts building
Because my trauma was the killer all along, wasn’t it?
I deserve to be flooded with love
I deserve to be flooded with love
Instead searching through dried up wells
I deserve to be flooded with love
I deserve something
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6. |
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Open your eyes and face the silence
You can’t hide yourself anymore
They can see right through your glass thoughts
You waste your mornings doing nothing,
But lying naked on the floor
Making a toast to mental Illness
Standing might make your knees tremble,
But you can hold my hand if you need it
I know I’ve worn those shoes before
You waste your mornings doing nothing,
But lying naked on the floor
Making a toast to mental illness
And bathing in your PTSD
You don’t have to pretend to be alright
Dust off your old Jean jacket
And take a good look at your self
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7. |
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Pacing miles around this vacant room
Holding hands and taking turns reliving our childhood traumas
I’m the worst kind of person that you’re somehow obsessed with
Through depression we can coexist and still feel conflicted
All the question marks and made up words
They’re so claustrophobic and exhausting
Just to live another day
Throwing fists and slurping ramen From the bottom of the trash barrel
I can’t talk to you when you’re like this
Don’t you fucking understand that
You’re nothing like the flower girl I used to know
Walking through the dandelions and ripping out the all weeds
Each day that I am left here alone
It makes me cry knowing that you’re not around anymore
I know I’m a mess,
But I’m getting so much better at cleaning up after myself
Washing dishes with a dirty sponge Only temporarily fixes the problem
But the bigger picture is left framed
By the steel bars on the bedroom window
I just want to be alone
And watch the bats fly over the pond
I’ll contemplate my poor life choices Over a bland cup of water
Fill the glass with intention
And pour it right on the floor
Why am I merely an afterthought
In the eyes of your own self-destruction
Projecting years of self loathing
Onto a friendship that means nothing now
Well if I step out that door, I’ll be gone And none of this will be my problem anymore
But I still give a fuck about you
And don’t want to see it end up this way
I know I share the blame
And apologize for my past contempt and prideful shame
I know you deserve so much better, Than blacking out from all the alcohol
And I think I can see clearer now
Because of all the bullshit that got us here in the first place
With our feet in the ocean water
the foundation slips out from beneath
Today marks the anniversary of a life of getting sober
And learning to love again
With our feet in the ocean water
The foundation turns into nothing
Today marks the anniversary of a life of getting sober
And learning to love ourselves
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8. |
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Fire is motion
Work is repetition
This is my document
We are all all we've done
We are all all we've done
We are all all we've done
We are all all defenses
Fire is motion, is motion growth
And you are colder than oldness could ever be
And you are bolder than buzzing bugs
My mama said
My cousin Bucky’s so boldy bald
My cousin Bucky never took his hat off
He kept the cap on
My cousin Bucky kept his hat on
He took the cat out when he was swimming
Ehh there's a lesson in there somewhere
Something nothing special
Bout boys who smell like salami
And boys who've never apologized
(But what about the girls who always apologize for everything when they don’t even have to)
Boy you smell like shit
And you are colder than oldness could ever be
And you are bolder than buzzing bugs
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RealoEmo New York
An internet based multimedia music entertainment group
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